JOKES FOR YOUR HEALTH

JOKES: -


Glad to be drunk

: A completely inebriated man was stumbling down the street with one foot on the curb and one foot in the gutter. A cop pulled up and said, “I’ve got to take you in, pal, you’re obviously drunk.”
Our wasted friend asked,” Officer, are ya absolutely sure I’m drunk.”?
“Yeah, buddy, I’m sure,”Said the copper.” Let’s go.”
Breathing a sigh of relief, the wino said,” Thank goodness, I thought I was crippled.

Biting Nails

Two golden-agars were discussing their husbands over tea.
“I do wish that my Elmer would stop biting his nails. He makes me terribly nervous.”
“My Billy used to do the same thing.” The older woman replied.” But I broke him of the habit.”
“How?”
I hid his teeth.

Signs that you’re Broke

At communion you go back for seconds.
You think of a Lottery ticket as an investment.
You’re formulating a plan to rob the food bank.
Long distance companies don’t call you to switch.
You give blood everyday. Just for the orange juice.
McDonald’s is the supplier of all your kitchen condiments.
American Express calls and says:” Leave home without it!”
Love never dies!

Two Lover plan to suicide.
Boy Jumped first from the plane, Girl closed her eyes and return back saying. Love is blind”. Boy in air opened his parachute saying “Love never dies”.

How to get your brain exercise two friends,
One day “sees” Saw Sea & saw” didn’t see sea.
“See” saw sea and jumped in sea.
“Saw” didn’t see sea but jumped in sea.
“See” saw “saw” in sea & “saw” saw “sea “in sea.
“See” saw” both saw sea & both “saw & sea” were happy to see Sea.
That is how to exercise your brain!.

On a rainy day.

An old man was standing with a book for sale.
A young man came to buy.
He bought the book for $ - 3000
Old man advised
“DON’T OPEN THE LAST PAGE OF THE BOOK otherwise you’ll face problem.”
Young man finished the book with great fear but didn’t open the last page.
But, after a week,
Out of curiosity he opened the Last page and he almost fainted to see….
Retail price: $ - 30/-